Anyone who has ever provided care for another person will tell you that caregiver burnout is indeed quite real. The concept of burnout went more mainstream as the COVID-19 pandemic significantly impacted health care workers, who would often work for days on end around seriously ill and dying people of all ages.
The concept of burnout is not new, however, and the experience of caregiver burnout is often felt heavily by those caring for older parents or loved ones, whose conditions are often chronic and deteriorate over time. It would be great if caregivers could press “pause” and get 24 hours of uninterrupted peace or time to catch up, but unfortunately there’s no magic pill, powder or pause button to cure caregiver burnout.
The best advice to get through and past these overwhelming feelings of exhaustion, resentment, depression and defeat often comes from others who have walked the same path. Here’s advice from real family caregivers for those who are experiencing caregiver burnout:
“Hire someone to come in once a week so you can get away.” Barbara E.
“[It’s so] easy to feel alone. Don’t let the exhaustion color your world. It is imperative to have a way to take breaks. Realize some things are not normal but don’t harm. Let them go. If they want to go through their closet all afternoon, and [it] doesn’t harm them—let them. Stay focused on safe [and] clean. As clean as in the past? Maybe not, but no harm. Lose any expectations of what should be. Find space for you. Make space for you.” Margaret C.
Realize some things are not normal but don’t harm. Let them go.
“Fill your cup first, and only then will you have the strength to care for others.” Karen B.
“I put my mom in respite care at an assisted living facility for two weeks so I could take a vacation. When I returned, she decided she wanted to stay in assisted living. It’s best for both of us.” Sandi C.
“Don’t wait too long to give up. I put my dad in an assisted living facility, and I love it. It was so hard to do, but now I see him once or twice a week and talk to him almost daily. My quality of life and mental health has improved so much. I should have done it years ago. I felt like I was letting him down by doing it, but he’s thriving and loving his new friends.” Clara E.
My quality of life and mental health has improved so much. I should have done it years ago.
“Turn to God. Pray, read inspired passages from the Bible. Turn to your people at church and set up a schedule for help … to give you time off to attend church functions, community functions or family functions. Also, go to your family for this kind of help. People need to be asked for help nowadays.” Sherrie B.
“Accept help when it’s offered.” Pamela D.
“Go on a trip, go out to dinner with a friend or go see a movie, and take 10 minutes a day to meditate and read an inspiring book.” Ellinda M.
“Take a break with a friend who will make you laugh! A week away will do wonders for the soul. Ask for more help from anyone and everyone, even if it’s help for you personally.” Deb Q.
A week away will do wonders for the soul. Ask for more help from anyone and everyone…
“Self-care is so essential! Get enough sleep, eat a healthy diet, and get some exercise.” Karen J.
“When someone says, ‘Let me know if I can do anything,’ take them up on their offer! Tell them what you need. Even if it is just sitting with your loved [one] for an afternoon so you can have some time off. People want to help but may not know what you need. So, tell them how they can help you.” Dani P.
“Find a walking partner and go for walks.” Ken K.
“Rest, refresh and relax.” Rosemary M.
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